Conscious connection, furious cooking, good TV & more tips for remaining sane and hopeful
Here are the things helping me survive Trump's second term.
WHOA. Are you reeling from Trump's first week in office, too? He certainly came in guns ablazin'. And, yes, it is much worse than last time around.
I’m horrified and scared but also feel a bit numb, no doubt a coping mechanism to ward off overwhelm and despair as Trump’s many executive actions, pardons, and general madness continue to dominate the news cycle.
What now?
Sadly, I don’t have a crystal ball to peer into the murky future of our fragile threatened democracy. It’s too soon to say which candidate will become the next DNC Chair (a good one or a status quo one), which advocacy groups people will coalesce around, which social media platform(s) will gain the most traction with people who oppose to totalitarian rule, which of Trump’s current coterie will be fired/quit/sued/disgraced, etc.
Amidst all the fear and darkness swirling around, there are a few things I find to be reliably helpful. I’m sharing them with you here in case they are also helpful to you:
Connecting. Talking to beloved family and friends, meeting up with people in person, building local (and virtual) community. Being with other like-minded people is truly an antidote to fear and despair. Why not start a weekly potluck or plan an ice skating party?
Getting outside. Going for a walk or hike. Sledding or skating with the kids. Taking a yoga, pilates or dance class. Do it with other people you like.
Cooking delicious, nourishing food. Putting thought and time into feeding yourself and your loved ones is rewarding and comforting. And tasty, of course. Crack open a cookbook or watch the TV series Salt, Fat, Acid, Heat with the lovely Samin Nosrat for inspiration.
Reading something other than the news. Not that anyone should stop reading the news but losing yourself in other realities may be a critical coping strategy right now (and for the next four years.) I’ve shared some of my favorite reads in this Googlesheet. I’m always looking for more recommendations so lay ‘em on me in the comments.
Watching something other than the news. Now is the time to be thankful for good TV, people! If you’re looking for suggestions, I highly recommend: Ted Lasso, The Good Place, Superstore, Brooklyn 99, Ghosts (the BBC version), The Big Bang Theory (and Young Sheldon if you’ve got young viewers at home), A Man on the Inside, All Creatures Great and Small (new season!), and Arrested Development.
Note: we’ve watched all of these with our two kids (a tween and a teen) as I am incapable of staying up late enough to watch shows that would be too mature for them. Again, recommendations are always appreciated so please let me know what shows you love.
Noting the growing light. It’s January and it’s cold and dark out there but I’ve begun to notice that the days are lengthening, slowly but surely. According to the interwebs, we’re gaining two minutes of daylight each day —and that number will continue to grow as we make our way around the sun. In addition to the pleasing fact that it stays light longer each day, this is a good metaphor for life under Trump.
Breathing. Reading the news can make it hard to breathe and listening to or watching it can be even rougher. Does your blood pressure also shoot up when you hear Trump’s voice or see his face? Pausing and focusing on your breathe can be helpful. One way to do this is by tracing the fingers on one hand with the index finger on your other hand — you can do this anytime anywhere. Start at the base of your thumb and breathe in through your nose as you trace your way up each finger and breathe out through your nose on your way down each finger. Repeat. I discovered this technique which is also known as “five finger breathing” by doing a desperate internet search when one of my kids was struggling with intense anxiety.
Want more?
I loved this post Tips for Trying Times (thanks for sharing it, Rekha!) All good advice.
If you’re looking for something a little more in-depth than five-finger breathing, I recently discovered a free 40-day daily mindfulness course taught online by Tara Brach and
that you might like. Give it a whirl; you’ve got literally nothing to lose. Again, it’s free!
What’s helping you stay sane and hopeful these days? Please don’t be shy about your own tips, tricks, wells of courage, and sources of peace and connection. We need all the help we can get.
Don’t forget to be kind to yourself and the people around you.
As my colleague Alexis always says, “Onward.”
Yes! I recently binged "Shrinking" which is by the same folks who make Ted Lasso, I think. SO GOOD.